Japan's sozzled salarymen: the lost tribe in a modern pickle

Japan's sozzled salarymen: the lost tribe in a modern pickle

Commercials for energy drinks and stomachache relief tend to lionize the salaryman.  AKB48 members cheer for them as they drink their instant remedies and soldier on.  They're the dudes-- and some women-- you see all over the trains in the morning and evenings.  White shirts, black suits and ties.  The young guys sometimes sport pointy-toed shoes and trendy hairstyles, but they're all off to the office to grind out another day.

It's a hard life, no doubt.  Up early, out late.  The company comes first, even above your mental and physical health.  There's a word for dying from overwork.  The buzzword is "black company," used for businesses that bully and abuse their employees, demand unpaid overtime, pay little, allow for no sick days and no paid vacation days, expect employees to work six or even seven days a week.  But the real word is just "company."  People are complicit in this exploitive system as well because they respond passively, but you can't really blame someone because the system grabs them as early as kindergarten.  Everything is preparation for tests and tests are preparation for lifetime employment of 60-80 hour weeks, after hours drinking and eventual retirement to a house you're not very familiar with to live with a family who have become strangers.  And resentful strangers because you lack basic social skills and disrupt their otherwise orderly lives with your disheveled presence.

And as lousy a time as these guys have, women involved in the workplace have it much, much worse. You work just as hard for even less money and then you're expected to act as hostess at these after-hours parties.  Sexual harassment and stalking cases are on the rise but this is only because women are learning to report these crimes rather than suck it up as they've been trained to do at every stage of their lives

Increasingly, too, the entire idea of lifetime employment with attendant security and safety has become a lie as well.  Companies depend on dispatch workers or temporary workers to skirt labor laws.  But even then you just define an employee to suit your corporate whims.  I had a friend who was listed on the payroll as a part-timer but worked 60 hour weeks, every week. 

Some people break the mold, though.  The "going my way" people.  That same friend introduced me to a co-worker of hers who eventually quit to become a full-time theramin instructor and performer.  I had a conversation student who quit one job with higher pay for one that allowed him to leave the office every day at 5pm and be with his family and have his weekends free for cycling.  Some people drift through a variety of part-time jobs, getting one then leaving it when the mood strikes them to live abroad for a while.  I see young families sometimes on weekend outings and the father's the one wearing the baby-carrier.  Shoot, just seeing an entire family unit together warms my heart.

Are women Japan’s saviours?

Are women Japan’s saviours?

I think so, but probably not in the way the old men of the LDP think they will be.  I'd love to see women here say, "You know what?  This is stupid.  I refuse to participate in a system that benefits people (i.e., the men in the LDP and their male business cronies) at the top and no one at the bottom and precious few in the middle.  And seems expressly designed to wreck women specifically."  I'd love for them to, as a group, exercise their power to fix some major systemic problems rather than participating in them and exacerbating them.  But that is not going to happen.  Working endless hours is a virtue.

Anyway, my ranting response aside, read the article I'm linking here.  It sums up what's happening and you'll quickly grasp the inherent stupidity in this scheme that's supposed to fix things.

AKB48 recruiting part-timers for Y1,000 per hour

AKB48 recruiting part-timers for Y1,000 per hour

Is AKB48 still popular here?  It seems they've been around forever now.  As recently as last year they were all over our TV in recognizable form, but either I've lost the ability to discern the group's members or they aren't as ubiquitous.  It's probably the latter.

While AKB's charms are lost on me, I get why they're appealing to a broad swath of people here in Japan.  When I first heard about them during their initial splash, I thought, "Well, yeah, they're masturbation fantasy fodder for pervy middle-aged train gropers."  They are that.  But to my surprise, I quickly learned AKB had a number of followers among my younger English conversation students.  They looked up to the girls in AKB and imitated their dance routines during class breaks.

It's like watching a high school class go through the motions over and over.  They even "graduate," but there are always newer, younger, cuter AKB members waiting for a chance to take over so that every role is filled.  You can project whatever image you like onto whatever one it is the company slots each girl into.  This one is the class leader, this one is the sporty girl, this one is shy, this one is smart, this one doesn't work hard enough so let's all hate her.  They're big sister, little sister, best friend, girl friend, one-handed lover, both sexy and chaste, all thing to all people.

However, what is most important is they work, work, work nonstop in a big, harmonious, cooperative group to perform and cheer on the all-so-important jiji and salarymen who run this country.  They inspire the next generation of homemakers and office ladies to do the same.  And they get little in return for their sweat and hardship yet never complain.  Self-sacrifice and the grind of endless labor to little personal return.  Your satisfaction comes from building up the whole rather than the part.  And if you don't feel any personal satisfaction, then that's okay, too.  You are not important at all.  In general, people dig that here, and it helps to have AKB serenading you while you endure it.

Now here's this part-timer scheme, which actually seems like a good idea for girls who want to be in AKB.  While the group apparently has several thousand members at any given time, meaning their national coverage continues unabated through all hours of the day and night, there aren't enough slots for aspirants.  While most high schools I know of forbid part-time jobs for students (these kids barely have enough time to breathe much less earn spending money, plus there will be time enough for work post-university and pre-marriage), who could refuse a starry-eyed youngster her chance to associate with her idols and get a little taste of the glamorous life of a celebrity who earns millions for someone other than herself?  You don't earn much as a contracted talent here, but baby, you are adored.

As a part-time AKB member, taking part in commercials and public handshake events, the pay is 1000 yen an hour, which beats minimum wage in the US, and most part-time jobs here in Japan as well.  That's better than some of the hourly rates I've seen advertised for part-time English conversation teachers.  And even though it's probably exhausting, you get to wear cute clothes and travel all over Japan.  All that has to be better than frying hamburgers or washing dishes.   If I were pretty enough and young enough, I'd be tempted to give it a shot myself.  Damn skippy.

But mostly, I think this is just a clever ploy to publicize a website where people can search for part-time jobs.

Akihabara’s first rental nerd looking to cash in on his jobless status

Akihabara’s first rental nerd looking to cash in on his jobless status

At least he's cheap.  The problem is, there are thousands of other guys about his age who have the same product to offer who are giving it away for free to their friends.  And if you're loner enough not to have any friends, then you may be in his target demographic but outside his ability to market himself to you.

I have an equally worthless skillset, but I'm at a loss on how to monetize it.  Movie trivia, for example.  Outside of a gameshow with that as a category, my being able to watch any given movie and tell you the resume of everyone on the screen in any given scene.  I have a better-than-layperson's grasp of several historical eras and specific events.  I could bore the hell out of you retelling the Little Bighorn fight, for example, and I'm currently reading a book filled with statistics and in-depth facts about the skeletons of the 7th Cavalry troopers who fought there.  I know a lot about art, both fine and pop.  I can give you biographies of a number of comic book characters in excruciating detail.  And the Beatles?  I'm no Eddie Deezen, but I know enough to qualify as a former member of the group.  Also, more closely related to the NEET in question, I've got plenty of hands-on experience finding different locations in Tokyo.  I could lead some somewhat more than half-assed geek tours around Akihabara, Harajuku, Shinjuku and Shibuya.  I know two locations where to buy American comics there, too.

Who wants to pay me to buddy up?

But one more thing, if anybody's reading, that is.  Nothing scientific.  Purely personal.  But seen from out here, there are a lot of young people who actually work and work hard.  At one of my old jobs I had high school kids who were holding down secret part-time jobs such as fry cook at Denny's.  This is on top of all the time-sucking requirements of Japanese school life, the clubs, the meetings, the special days and after-school activities, the test preparation and cram school studies.  And college students working retail.  My wife has been almost continuously employed since her teenaged years in all kinds of jobs.  She's never been afraid of getting her hands dirty or taking a minimum-wage job just to keep busy and be productive.  I'm the same way.  I may have hated doing so, but I've always been able to pull a crappy job to tide me over until a better one came along.  I appreciate it's not so easy for everyone, and I know the economy isn't in the best shape and those "bubble" years are long in Japan's past now, but if the local job wanted magazines are any indication, there are plenty of restaurants, shops, convenience stores, hairdressers, factories and clinics hiring here, and our city isn't even as bustling as great, big Tokyo.  You could probably get one of those jobs in Tokyo and still find plenty of free time for hanging out in Akihabara, especially if you're fortunate enough to have parents willing to subsidize most of the rest of your life.

But maybe actually making money talking about Gundam models isn't his true motivation.  Maybe he's after something else, something more elusive but potentially more lucrative, like Internet fame he can turn into a regular spot on one of the many inane TV shows we have here where people walk around doing nothing, then pop into a restaurant and do more nothing.  Anyway, best of luck to this guy!  Who knows-- maybe he's found a niche market and will be looked upon as a genius in coming years.

Easy time getting my work visa extended...

I hate going to government offices, whether in Japan or back in the United States.  They tend to be dreary places with all the atmosphere of an elevator and none of the exotic and exciting allure of a doctor's office.  The immigration office here is no exception, and the staff there aren't particularly friendly.  Not that I expect them to chat me up, but a little smile every now and then would certainly make the experience more fun and fulfilling for all involved.

On the other hand, what our local immigration official lack in charm, they more than make up for where it counts:  efficiency.  This year would have been the easiest experience with Japanese immigration if not for the severe screw-up on our part.  We tried for the spouse visa, but failed for reasons I won't go into here, but are completely due to my lack of diligence.  The work visa proved a quick process, this time with a total turnaround time of less than 60 hours.  I went one day, turned in the paperwork, received my postcard the next day, had my new ID card and 3-year extension then next.

I'm curious if anyone has ever had problems extending their work visas despite having valid contracts with established companies.  I've known people who had to leave Japan when their cultural visas ran out and the Ministry of Justice refused to grant extensions, but I've yet to hear of anyone losing out on a work visa.  No doubt people make mistakes on their paperwork, or else the MoJ blows it somehow on their end.  While the whole thing is a bit inconvenient at best, I've never had a visa denied.  Am I lucky or just like everyone else?  Maybe I should find out.

Yeah.  I'll do that.  Someday.